Crazy?

I used to think I was crazy,
I’d wake up in the morning and pull the hair from my scalp
Because it wasn’t lying down properly.
I’d create a tornado in my room
Because I didn’t know what to wear.
Everything was either too tight,
Or itchy,
Or hot,
and God why doesn’t anything fit.
I used to think I was crazy
Because I would go to bed hungry.
Because the best time to lose
Is when you can’t feel it.
I used to think I was crazy
I kept my mouth shut in class
Because a boy once told me I talked too much
and that I was loud.
So I started writing poetry,
I used it as a silent scream,
A way to say what I couldn’t.
I’d read the same ones over and over again at night,
They’d play in a constant loop in my head.
And eventually I started reading these poems to my mother,
I read to her about the sad and happy,
About grief, and love, and loss.
I asked her if she thought I was crazy,
She said no
You’re just a woman.